How to build your inner promise so that you will always do what you'll do

How cool would it be to say, “I am gonna go and workout today” and then you do it or how cool will it be to be able to say, “I’m gonna eat and follow my plan today and stick to my plan.”

Related: Lacking motivation? You need to hear this.

 

So the first question I want to ask you based on this is can you remember a time when you just felt really good in your body? Can you remember a time when you were feeling more energized or you felt like you were really on it? When did you feel like you were in control? When did you feel like you were empowered? What did that look like for you? So for me when I think about the times when I’m really feeling really good, really focused, really confident, really like on a roll, really high energy, it’s generally when I have created a series of really healthy habits  that when I do those habits I am able to achieve the thing that I want.

I’ll give you an example and one of the big things that I did in my life is to do with running. So I used to run. Now I don’t run anymore because now I do strength training but I used to run and I did train and ran a marathon about seven or eight years ago. I was so consistent. I created a plan. I told myself I was gonna do three runs a week and I did a big run at the weekend and I did that consistently for six months. Now you’re probably thinking, “Well that was easy for you because you’re probably naturally athletic you mean you are a personal trainer you’re probably naturally motivated” and that sort of thing I’m here to tell you I am NOT motivated one bit. In fact, the only reason that I do what I do now is that I made it my job to turn up all day every day.

So I am NOT the most motivated person in the world, in fact, would not consider myself motivated but what I have done and what I’m very smart and being able to do is first of all build myself some habits that make it easier for me to build that inner promise. So I’ve built some habits I’ve also built this inner promise this inner will within myself that when I say that I’m going to do something that I do it. How do I do that very simply so the way that I have done that when I first started that marathon training I had not run more than maybe a mile. I used to run a mile maybe on a treadmill or you know go for a walk and I’d run a bit. That was kind of the extent of it but what I did build up was I’m gonna go for a run and then I went for a run.

I built up this inner word, this inner will that I had which takes two parts: one, having the goal and why you’re doing the thing and being driven by that internal motivation but also understanding that I needed to build that inner promise to myself that if I said I was gonna do a run I was gonna do it.

Set up your environment for success 

I just put my running gear up ready the night before I would be able to jump straight in somewhere and I would go so that was me setting up my environment for success to the point then during that training that if I said I was gonna go for a run nothing stopped me. There was nothing that stopped me then because even though at the moment I wanted to go for a run or knew I had to do it. Did I want it? No, but I had told myself I was going to do it.

Focus on creating healthy habits

The other way that you can build this inner promise and this is one of the things that we’re going to be doing as part of our next 90-day challenge. So every couple of months as part of our Warrior Goddess Kettlebell Training tribe we have a 90-day challenge. Now we’ve been doing 28-day challenges. We’ve been trying all these different six-week challenges but the 90-day challenge is the one that has worked the most and we’re about to embark on a 90-day challenge and it’s going to be focusing on creating healthy habits based on the goal you’ve been wanting to achieve. Here’s how it works: you choose to give up something that you know is not really serving you towards your goal. Something not to do with weight loss so as not to get the dieting or any of those sorts of things. Nothing to do with the numbers on the scale but it could be a food group or coffee or alcohol or something like that, that doesn’t serve you.

The reason why we’re doing this is because this is where I started to learn my inner promise the most.

I’ve been a vegetarian since I was 13 and that was something that I realized I developed an inner promise very quickly but that was you know as a teenager. But what I realized was I was very good at that so when I did then decide that I was going to give up dairy. The thought of giving up cheese was horrendous, to be honest. Cheese was my friend but I thought right I’m gonna try this I’m not gonna take any milk in my tea anymore. I’m gonna try different milks I’m gonna try not consuming cheese let’s see if I can do this for 30 days. I gave myself just the goal of giving something up for 30 days that I thought was not gonna be good for me but also to see the effects of it and also because I wanted to see if I told myself I’m not gonna do this would I do it and I gave that up I mean I very rarely eat cheese at all right now I very rarely eat any dairy at all. But that was maybe you know six or seven years of slowly just giving up something for a certain amount of time and seeing how I felt in my body because that’s what’s really important.

This process is about building that inner word and giving up something that doesn’t serve you well. You will feel a little bit of a sense of loss but that loss actually empowers you.

So how do you build that in a word very simply: pick one thing that you think no longer serves you well. One thing that you know that if you give up would actually add more energy, would actually make things easier.

As for myself, I’m gonna be doing sober October this month just to see and how that feels. It’s my birthday next month I might still go back to having a couple of drinks here and there but I’m gonna be doing it just for October.

 

Feel stronger with your inner promise

When I built my inner word and my inner promise that’s when I felt stronger. When I knew that I if I said I was gonna do something that I did it that’s how I did it. I did it day by day, step by step. There’s gonna be times where life is gonna challenge you and curveballs are gonna come in but it’s really important for you to stick to that inner word with just one thing first and foremost so rather than going on a diet, rather than any of that sort of thing this is about building that inner word because the more stronger you get with building that inner word, the more stronger you get with having that sense of believing yourself, building your confidence, building your self-belief, then you can add things later on so it’s much easier.

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Lisa Barwise

Author Lisa Barwise

Hi, I'm Lisa. I consider myself a Wellness Alchemist, the catalyst in the transformation of Strong Women around the world. Strong of mind, body and character.

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